What’s (Y)our Story?

Growing up as a kid
The only thing I really cared about
Was not miss my Saturday morning cartoons
Going outside to play with my friends
And come night time
Keep this mind awake long enough to
Watch along with my siblings
Tales from the Crypt

So when I entered my early teens
I assumed that the world was the same
In that we as human beings shared the mindset
Where ethnicities was only to identify
And verify that while we are all a bit different
We share similar ideals
Ethics, morals and all loved Honey Nut Cheerios

That was until
I entered into high school
Where according to my society
Stereotypes and prejudice
Was apparently a big thing
And I was assigned
A new preconceived “Asian” identity

It was cute at first, really
I would even say a bit…flattering
People often assumed I was related
Bruce, Jackie and Jet Li
I could bluff my way
Into knowing Kung-Fu
To the 10th degree
And if I yelled loud enough
My hair might turn blonde and spiky
Like the Goku on Dragonball Z

But after awhile
People got comfortable
And in the war on race

“All y’all Asians look the same!”

Hearing this on a daily basis
Had made me realize
What my society believed
About people similar to me
Giving me the impression they felt
That we have no suffering
That we can easily succeed without struggling
That we don’t have a story
And that we don’t have an identity

They were wrong

And this wasn’t just my
Non-Asian audience
This lack of knowledge
Lived within my own Asian friends
Where the only time for “pride”
Was if we yelled before it “A-Z-N!”

I couldn’t kick it with that idea
I wanted to come correct
Express to represent
Let my fellow peers understand
That my parents had a struggle
They too made heartwrenching decisions
And still fight for their children lives

Because my heritage is here
I’m not just another “Asian”
I’m Vietnamese-American

I write poetry
And stand up to the mic
To bring people together
As words and stories
Bind us as a community
Because like a real race
There are tons of different ethnicities
Each with their own
Individual stories

Stories I want to fall in love with
Because knowledge is power
And as Uncle Ben once said
“With great power comes great responsibility”

A responsibility that we
As a community melting pot
Must encourage the appreciation
Of our similarities
But at the very same time
Respect the differences 

For when it comes down to it
Wherever you come from
There are issues in our country
That affect us all across the board
War, health, political, disease, disaster, and so on
Isn’t discriminatory towards what you look like

We have achieved success  
Within our own community and organizations 
If we pulled together our knowledge
Gather our resources
We can answer the questions at hand
Solve the problems now
So that our future
Can have a story to tell
For generations to come

So now tell me
What’s going to be
(Y)our story?

Love Part One: Rare Rose Gold

Let me just say that I’m no art major nor do I have the knowledge of real art enthusiasts. I’m sorry to offend!

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I’ll be straight forward
There is a girl I’ve come to admire
Her looks, wit, and words
Have me purely inspired
I’ll be honest and say
That she has me falling

And for the sake of this poem
Her name will be LemoN
As life suddenly decided
To throw her into my direction

“Make something of this” said Life

Disregarding the cliché of making lemonade
I listened to the words of Atmosphere
Who once said of lemons to
“Paint that shit gold.”

And I shit you not
I have sat in my room
With a paintbrush and canvas
Painting away the perfect
Piece of art that I could make
In hopes that one of these days
I’ll give it to LemoN
And she’ll be astounded
She’ll see how pretty she truly is
And how she could make the Milky Way stop
Dead in its orbital tracks

But I can’t perfect said art piece
For I’m as much as a painter
As Nikola Tesla was an Iron Chef

Not really

I refused to give up there
Because as a poet
I’ve been given the job
To paint pictures with words
That would incept your mind
Of the beauty that I see

So picture this

Single Asian female
Addicted to Target’s sales
She’s not too short
Nor too tall
She holds her own at dinner
Yet she stays slender bodied
And never going any skinnier

If I were to paint her with Choe’s finesse
She’d be in a blue dress
That would electrify the oil based city
Sending shocks of beauty
That makes me weak in the knees
Because she’s just absolutely stunning

If I were paint her with Audrey’s skill
She would be plain faced only
To show her beauty is also au natural
Clean, simple, and perfect all around
Because when you look at her
Sometimes all you can say is just
“Damn, you’re beautiful.”

And if I were to paint
With Da Vinci’s perfection
LemoN would be Mona Lisa
Her smile painted enigmatically
The beauty of not only her face
But her hands, neck and breast would
Light up the very canvas
In a way that announces her presence

And lastly her eyes
Her gaze upon me
An observer of “beauty”
Capturing her very sincere essence
I paint these eyes perfectly
No outlines or other artsy gimmick

Because if eyes are
Truly windows to the soul
Then you’d see why she inspires me
For her eyes are tinted a rare rose gold

When people say positive things about my poetry/writing…

Three Parts Love Prequel

To say love is overrated
Should be a phrase to be cremated
Heart broken in one place
Only to fuck some other face

Love isn’t what makes you jaded
It’s just you
Who thinks love must be hated
But don’t fret as love for you will soon be true

Love doesn’t embody one being
I mean it can and it will
But understand you must be willing
To look in others heart for yours they’ll fill

For there are three parts to love

The person you desire to hold
May be a tough find but it takes time
To refine “Rare Rose Gold”

The unforgettable faces
Who will never leave your side 
At “Your Home Base”

And soar high above
For we each represent 
A “Younique One Love”

If Anyone

There comes a time where in life, in the midst of all things fucked up, we all need to step back to re-evaluate ourselves.

Life throws lemons at us to make lemonade for god knows why, self-proclaimed critics throw tomatoes when we perform horridly to get off the stage, and our esteem breaks us down in places where we need the most support.

However take the time once a day to or a week to step away from the spotlight that is “everyday life” and breathe.

Simply breathe.

Sit down and lay your eyes upon the skies and say not a word. Leave your phone in your pocket. Capture the sky within your mind for yourself.

Be selfish for once.

And when you’re done, lay your presence on the world. Leave your worries and low self esteem in the back of your mind. Capture the success that has been told was out of reach. Because if it’s something you need to know is true, is that if anyone thinks they know you better than you; they’re mistaken.

“Trust your struggle”

The Mixtape

With my excitement for the upcoming mixtape of Toestah coming up entitled “Dangerzone” and production help from my brother himself, I did a quick write up inspired by the concept and ideaology. I used the sample tracklist given to me to incorporate it into this piece as a challenge to myself as a writer. I hope you guys all enjoy!

Keep an eye out for the new mixtape y’all from TOESTAH! #DANGERZONE

https://www.facebook.com/toestahmusic

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I’ve seen a lot with these chinky brown eyes
Encounters with the cops
And death more than I can suffice
I’ve heard plenty in these early years of life
As days came passing on by
The ignorance of
My decisions and actions
Have caused unstable emotional reactions
Affecting the many lives around me

You see nowadays I’m being
Judged on superficial things
But had I closed my eyes
Opened my ears
And maybe started listening
I might have been able to hear
The boy crying on the inside
Because his ego won’t stop drinking
Or the baby’s heartbeat getting slower
And slower because this mind
Has become a coke fiend

Leaving the comfort of home
Only to enter the dangerzone
Where my responsibilities
Has become corrupted by Zerg
Arch nemesis of Buzz Lightyear
Locking away the idea
To infinity and beyond
Of why my parents
Journeyed to America
To give me a life here

But ignorant I stayed
For I just wanted to celebrate
Especially when there’s a date with Molly
And after a few shots of Henny
Performing drunk and
Fucked up on these stages
Alludes me to the idea
That the world is mine

So I keep it up
To avoid the realities
Of a sober state of mind
Because this high
Has got me feeling too good

Yet in actuality the homies in the hood
Are describing me otherwise
How I’m painting myself differently
Using a palette consisting of only white
And how I’m stumbling way off beat
Sniffing instead of spitting these lines
Because with each line of coke that’s done
The natural chemicals have been subtracted
And multiple drug addiction has been added

Fallen like a soldier
Hands down
Face down

The ignorance of
My decisions and actions
Have caused the emotional reactions
Of the loved ones around me

Finally understanding that in today’s world
You can have whatever you want
And what I want is to get back home
Become the up and coming artist I aspire to be
As it’s almost morning
And this come down has got me thinking

Las Vegas isn’t proper city lights
It’s on the other side of Nevada’s state line
In the city of angels
Where it’s dirty, inspiring, unforgiving
But yet somehow always welcoming
Reminding me home is where the heart is
And that my closest friends and family
Have assured me that I’m not alone

For they have become my safezone

Three Parts Love Series

Turn up the love. “Three Parts Love” series now in motion. #OneLove #RoseGold #Homebase

HOMEBASE

The below excerpts are taken from Shihan’s “Fathers Day” poem.

”’Daddy do you still love me?’ 
I thought I’d die when she asked me that
My heart felt like
I ain’t got a metaphor for that
It just hurts.”

The poem Shihan writes to the audience about the question his daughter asks him hits home. Not in the sense that I have a child of my own but in the sense of how I feel with my friends and family.

“So I try and keep composure
And explain to her everything
That she needs to hear
To let her know that
Her daddy will always be here
And tears form under my eyelashes
Pregnant with guilt…”

Sometimes I feel as though my friends have asked questions of if I still loved them or if we’re still friends. Questions like those hurts my heart. Even just the feeling or the possibility of that question being brought up scares me.

I got a new poem for you guys coming up soon and it’s going to be one I will push to spread the love. 

“And later I break down in areas of my house I keep my secrets in”

#HOMEBASE

The Fortress

Dedicate to a great deal of inspiration to me, Tiffany Huynh.

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The story goes
The princess is atop a tower waiting to be saved
Surrounded by the scent of brimstone
And scorching blue electric flames

Guarded by a dragon
And that’s the irony
Because the dragon is protecting her
Warding off these fake ass so-called “warriors”
Who think they are going to save her
Because let’s be honest
He could end her
With just a burp of his flames
But he doesn’t
He won’t
As he too wishes for this princess
To be saved
To find love
To help her find a man worthy
For the flames
To be contained

She isn’t scared of the fire
She’s not afraid of the dragon
Who protects her
As she hid herself away
Behind these castle walls
Looking from above in her tower
Waiting for her Knight
Not in shining armor
As she knows a true warrior’s armor
Should never be shining
As it meant he never
Went through any fighting
For anything
Because damaged chest plates and gauntlets
Are filled with stories of battle and struggle
That contains the tale
Of his pilgrimage to reach her

So until then
Punk Hazard is where
She will stay
As she knows she’ll be saved
She’s just waiting for the day
She can leave the fortress
Behind someday